dolL * 17 - oddnesS

she feels unfilled since that day

even she has been busy with works

her time was filled up

but not her mind

she got a lot of things to think and do

somehow she felt odd

something has been left out in her heart

which she used to very familiar with it

she put it in freezer of her heart

still it comes back randomly

now she's confused

she accepted the fact

sometime the air still got stucked in her chest

she felt that she doesn't own anything

since the drug was taken away from her

she lost her addiction yet she's not

maybe she's juz haven't get used to it

piece of her soul lost somewhere

need times to get it back

maybe she should put all that aside

go back to her fantasy world for vacation

do what she likes for herself

recharge the low battery to full

sometimes a fall doesn't equal to a lost

it enhances the strength to move further

she learnt the imperfect

she believes that

she had gone for what she wants

so be it if it doesn't want her back

maybe it doesn't deserve her anyways

dolL * 16 - exhausteD

she didn't know it would bring trouble to him

if she knew she won't ask for anything

she was took to pieces

she didn't expect this would happen

it's ok if he doesn't understand her feeling

but it realli hurt

when he scolded her

she knew it's useless to talk more

at that moment

if he felt better to put his temper on her

she would juz accept it

she juz hope nothing changes

she is still the one who always here for him

whenever he needs

go ahead for what he likes

as long as he is happy

thats enough for her

maybe she would try to change

her way of concern

but

the sister wouldn't leave him away

he is always her lovely brother

what happened is happened

she couldn't control it

she really hopes he understands

and believes in her

she won't do things that will trouble him

she need a rest

dolL * 15 - confuseD

the little birdie is staring at her

but she don think it can understand her

same like he doesn't understand her dream

hardly to give a smile

they have been gone thru all this

with honest and sincere

but couldn't find a same exit

how long would it be

from now on to the feel of heart ache

is there any imminent?

sometimes it is suffering

when pretend not to say a word

how does an expectation look like

her heart got hurt juz in a sudden

is it all about he hold hand with someone else

or the matter between her and him

he told her where is he going

yet she confused

at the next moment

she couldn't figure out

dolL * 14 - hurT

this is the first time

her dream comes true in real life

but she can't breathe the air

bcoz it's a dream which she doesn't wish to come true

how could this happened ?

all her six sense and observations

are correct

she is sick now..

her chest got stucked

hardly feels the air to breathe in

her brain run out of oxigen

she needs a doctor

to cure her sickness

to assemble her broken pieces of wing

the angel is too weak to fly

she is actualli not that strong as she thought

she need a support

for her to fly further

nothing is perfect in this world

learn better from the fall

take the imperfect to replace

be strong to continue journey

no matter how heart ache is
always need time to heal it

the angel wishes he could see

she flies higher with the wounded wing

drugGz

he is a drug

she knew he got nothing good

but still she addicted to him

once she get used of it

day after day

it's hard to get it off

yet she knew

it's not good for health

to become a second hand smoker

but still she don mind of it

she is exhausted

bcoz the drug is taken away

from her

her care for who he is

will never reduce

dolL * 13 - abandoN

she got a dream last nite

which make her hardly breathe the air now

she doesn't wish this to happen

yet it happened...

her six sense is always right

she couldn't believe that is true

it's so complicated

she is falling down from the tree

and feels the hurt

she owaz reserved a seat for him next to her

but now he is happy to be with someone else

which he didn't notice that

she is waiting in the park

her tears dropped into her heart

no one see it

maybe it's too late when she realized that

she's actualli had reserved for him

a place in her heart which she get used to

she always be there whenever he needs

juz that all this while

she doesn't think that she'd miss him

that much

she has been deny her real feeling to everyone

and herself

she's not only cares for him as a friend

she wanted to get this off her chest

she wondered why ppl always got their love easily

but she's always the one left behind

she doesn't how to sort it out

no word can describe her feeling at this moment

only

eMpty

='<

she tried to take a picture of love

tried to type a message

she got a piece of paper

but its empty

...

dolL * 12 - holD

she wanted to get rid off her madness

she sat on the tree branch alone

yet her mind couldn't stop blending

all the word he said

and the name mentioned

how could she juz get mad of a name?

she guess she must be crazy edi

she knows mayb he don think that
she is trying to do her best for him

but she is juz blank in a sudden

when he is probably taken off

she couldn't imagine that

if she has to learn to live

without bother for him
it's not easy to accept a changes

either physically or mentally

bcoz she's so get used to him

all this while

she holds tightly to the branch

she scared to get hurt

from falling down from the tree

she doesn't know how to get down from the tree

she doesn't know what's the purpose
keep on mentioning the name to her

make her so moody edi

emo

empty

time freeze

...

she wants to hold the second

and she hopes nothing is moving on

could it be?

dolL * 11 - addictioN

x'mas coming soon

she was with the pig on the x'mas eve last year

it's would be a sweet memory

between her and pig

he's the one she likes

in her fantasy world

back in reality

she got addicted to him

the one she cares

it doesn't equal to the one she likes

she realized that
it wouldn't be the same person
the one she likes and the one she loves

she stayed at the origin

she got stuck between her fantasy and what is real

but no doubt

she prefers to be with the one she adapted to

she dono if she would quit

instead of stepping into it

she's already get used to him

but suddenly he is going on with someone else

she is getting mad and jealous

she hardly breathes the air

it's all bcoz of him

dolL * 10 - meltinG

it's has been so long she missed out her pig

since summer and now winter begins

quiet all this while, busy with lives

till got no extra time to think of it

after gave her special present to him on his bday

everything going on as usual

nothing is changed..

she had tried to bury all her feeling

deep into her heart

without any expectation of return from the present

but

all the hidden feeling came out again

at the moment she saw him today

she realize that she's still mind of him

the pig is always in her heart

she didn't let go of him but juz put aside

she thought she has lost feeling to him

but she's actualli not..

she thought she has lock her mind

of being apart from him

but this time

she may have failed

bcoz she has loved him from the start

she guess she will be fall for him

over again

...

she was juz kept an ice cream in the freezer

to maintain its shape all this while

once the green light indicates

it still melts

it's freezing outside

but her heart is melting

...